Hi, I’m Kat Vellos. I help people build friendships in cities that weren't designed for connection, and I advocate for changing how we design cities so friendship becomes easier for everyone.

I’m the author of the book We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better Friendships, which was released in January 2020 in response to an already looming loneliness epidemic that was later declared by Surgeon General Vivek H. Murthy in September 2024.

The longest longitudinal study done on human thriving (The Harvard Study of Adult Development) found that the most important factor in our health, happiness, and longevity is the quality of our relationships. 

My background is in UX design and community building, and I regret to report that the UX of our neighborhoods is leaving millions of people disconnected and lonely. My work puts me on the frontlines, working directly with individuals who have a hard time creating local friendships and community because their buildings, blocks, neighborhoods, and cities weren’t designed for connection. 

I speak to city leaders, architects, urban planners, urban designers, and builders to encourage them to design for connection. Design creates our cities, shapes our culture, and can foster our connections — if we let it. 

I’d love to talk about this at your company, conferences, universities, associations, and gatherings with other people working in related areas. Let’s work together to inspire the current (and next) generation of New Urbanists and city builders to create places where people can more easily build community and experience feelings of belonging and connection. Reach out any time.

Learn more about my work: Check out my 60+ podcast interviews on Spotify, featuring episodes with The Good Life Project, Meetup HQ, Brave UX, KPBS, and more.